Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to coat check the pizza.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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