hell yes lets make some ravioli
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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