3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize