My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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