Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize