if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
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