Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Randomize