i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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