it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize