I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize