ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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