I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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