Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Randomize