Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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