Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize