2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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