i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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