We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize