i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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