this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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