just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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