All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
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