When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
You can't special order awesome
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
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