If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize