Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize