wat bout pragnant strippers??
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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