I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize