"it" just moved
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
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