He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Randomize