your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Randomize