dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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