I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
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