You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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