I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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