Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
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She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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