I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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