I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
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He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
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I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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