I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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