dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
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