Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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