Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize