She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize