I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
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