She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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