I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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