i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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