Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
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