I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize