literally had 100 drinks last night.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize