For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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